As most of you have probably already seen there is a Smurfs movie on the horizon. Much like the Chipmunks and Garfield before it, this will be a horrible movie that children will force their parents to endure over and over again. Luckily, my daughter isn’t born yet to drag me to see this blue abomination. Since I can’t think of a worse fate than watching the Smurfs, so I thought about the Smurfs being the thing in the box that John Doe has delivered for Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman at the end of Se7en.


James “I’m on team Snork” Alvarez