Congratulations on reaching the Sweet 16! We’ve been truly #blessed by your creativity and sense of humor. Now it’s time to descend in to the world of curse. Cursed images, to be exact.
Theme: That’s right motherfuckers. It’s the hated picture tweet round. Choose one of the images below and write a tweet involving it in some way, and post the picture with your tweet. You can write a caption for the image, dialogue, a response to it, or give it the meme treatment. Dazzle us, you lucky so and so.
Deadline: MONDAY 3/18 1:38 pm PST
Post your tweet to your timeline and DM it to @theobscuregents
Congratulations to those of who you survived the 7 Deadly Sins. Apparently sloths are cute and that God guy is a real character. It’s on to our next theme.
Now it’s time to flash that 140, shorty. It’s old-school tweet time! Short tweet time! Tweeter, it’s character count time Hand on the @ Select All, Copy-Paste, Tools>Word Count DM the tweet to @obscuregents before he pops one in your brain Stop playing 280 character games with me Representing the OFAPZ X dangerously, tweeter
If there’s one thing we love here at OFAPZ, it’s an incredible first round. Thank you all for sharing your wide-ranging takes on nostalgia.
If there are seven things we love, they’re pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath and sloth. That’s right, we’re reprising one of the hottest topics in the history of our contest. It’s heaven and hell, oh well.
Theme: Seven Deadly Sins. Write a tweet riffing on the concept of the seven deadly sins, any one or several of the listed sins themselves, create your own sins, ponder the penalties for committing sin, or tweet a video of you committing all seven simultaneously (please don’t). Stipulations: Listen vatos, we’re not going to go to the trouble of investigating who tweeted first or second, but please avoid copying your opponent’s premise as some kind of strategic chess move. When the judges see a matchup where both tweets just “happen” to be about being in the back of an Uber and having a conversation about sin with the driver, they just end up hating both. And this is about love. Don’t kill the love.
Deadline: 3/13 11:34am PST
Post your tweet to your timeline and submit via DM to @theobscuregents
It’s hard to believe that Obscure For A Penny Zero is already 10 years old! (Editor’s Note: It’s not. Our blog writer doesn’t know the difference between our 10th contest and a 10th anniversary). It seems hard to believe that we’ve been hosting this twitter contest since 2009 (Editor’s Note: We haven’t. This is the 10th contest, not the 10th year.) Even Twitter itself has changed so much! (Editor’s Note: That part is true).
So let’s celebrate our 10th anniversary (Editor’s Note: 10th contest) by going all the way back to 2009 (Editor’s Note: It was 2015) and reprising our first ever theme.
Theme: Nostalgia. Tweet a nostalgic observation, sentiment or vignette, or tweet about the experience of nostalgia itself.
Restrictions: New content only.
Deadline: 3/8/2019 11:34am pst
Post your tweet to your own timeline and then copy-paste the text to @theobscuregents
Note: The Deadline was always going to be 3/8/2019 so these are bonus days for you all.
Tajerouine Obscure For A Penny Zero X: Who will come out on top?
It’s hard to believe it’s been 10 years. That’s because it hasn’t, that would be wild. But the OFAPZ tweet contest is in its 10th incarnation. And you, lovely sir or madam or enby, stand a 1 out of 128 shot of coming out on top!
Whether you’re a virgin warrior or a grizzled veteran with scars and psychic wounds to show for it, take a moment to read everything below. It’ll make your time so much more enjoyable once the games begin.
Our contest plays out under conventional bracket-style rules. This is like 80s movies where you see a bracket on the screen and people get eliminated and everyone in their 20s looks like they’re 40 because of smoking and ozone.
Contestants are initially seeded based on follower count, doing battle over the course of several rounds, each with its own unique topic or theme. All tweet matchups are judged anonymously based on the text of the tweets alone, by a diverse panel of judges including accomplished writers, artists and humorists from primarily outside of the Twitterverse. The judges do not see race, gender, or what type of Shrek/Sonic the Hedgehog fetish you may suffer.
Why We Do How We Do
Anonymous judging and the diversity of our judging panel help ensure that your tweet will rise (or fall) on its merits alone. You won’t get any special consideration for your follower count, Favstar trophies (RIP), which Twitter clique you claim, or the percentage of your avi that consists of cleavage. Your reputation and past glories don’t matter. The judges choose between two tweets based on their ability to put a truly unique and funny spin on the topic at hand. The winner moves on to the next round, and so on and so forth, until one champion remains standing.
How Do It Happen
All contestants will be given the round’s theme and have a week (Round 1 and 2 or 24 hours or sometimes more to respond with a new, original tweet.
Once you have posted your tweet, submit it to @theobscuregents account and @obscuregent will then send you and your opponent’s tweets text-only to a panel of 11 judges.
Once you submit, your opponent will be notified. Once they submit, you are both locked in and judging commences.
Winners will be announced as they are decided.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How many tweets can I tweet?
A: Everyone has different tactics and strategies. Tweet as many or as few responses to the prompt as you want. You only submit one. Just make sure you’re happy with it. Send one tweet and one tweet only to @theobscuregents via DM. You can, however, change your submission as long as your opponent hasn’t locked in the battle with their submission.
Q: Can I use old tweets or do they have to be new?
A: Of course they have to be new. Why is this a question? This isn’t some random tweet call.
Q: Is this contest fixed?
A: No, you’re a sore loser. We don’t care who wins. We just want to laugh at quality content. When you submit a very generic joke that the judges have seen over and over again, they will most likely vote for the other tweet.
Q: My friends say my tweet was better. How did I lose to a horrible tweet?
A: This is why you’re here. To submit your content to an unbiased panel who don’t know you or your friends. Your friends will tell you that you’re amazing because THEY ARE YOUR FRIENDS. Take the loss with grace and humility.
Q: Can you give me any details about the vote tally and the judges’ discussion?
A: In the end, are we all not dust in the wind?
Q: What if my opponent doesn’t submit?
A: In round 1, we have a list of potential contestants on stand-by. One of them will take your absentee opponent’s place. In every subsequent round, your opponent will forfeit and you will advance by default.
Q: I’m an edgy humorist who tweets over-used clichés involving sex. Will I win? Of course I will, right?
A: We’re looking to reward the original, fresh and funny. That could mean something sexy, but don’t confuse shock value for craftsmanship.
Q: I go viral every other week. I’m going to win, right?
A: Tweet-decking, bots, great networking skills have no power here and neither does yo momma.
Q: Can I protest the result to @ObscureGent?
A: Sure you can. He will probably say “Oh wow, crazy.” What he really means is: It’s just a fucking contest, move on ya jerk.
Q: I’m a big fan of the Obscure Gentlemen. Do I have an edge for knowing them?
A: No! The judges have no idea who you are and hate kind of pandering references in tweets.
Q: I’m going to ask @obscuregent for advice in choosing the tweet I submit. That’ll give me an edge, right?
A: No. Do NOT ask him for advice. He hates giving it and his track record isn’t anything to write home about.
