I love Halloween. If Halloween was a woman I’d … OK, lets’s not go into that territory of metaphorical copulation with the abstract.

Anyway, so Halloween is pretty bad-ass and I dig almost everything about it. The movies, the music, the imagery and even the ridiculous costumes. Most of all, Candy, FREE CANDY! Well, maybe not free, since I’m too old to do the door-to-door thing, but still.

I wanted to talk about something that pisses me off, something that chaps my ass. I hate when people give the whole goddamn history of Halloween and bitch about how it’s not good anymore.

Why do I hate this? Well, I was one of those people. Someone would talk about Halloween and say something stupid. I’d spout crap about the Celts and the true meaning. Then one day I realized, who really cares? A holiday’s origins are meaningless, considering that there is no way they will ever return back to form. This day is mainly billed for Children. Let’s be honest, regardless of how creepy and grim we try and make it, it’s all about little kids having fun by dressing up as monsters and getting free candy. The one time in their lives they can act like the weird bastards they really are and not get scolded.

So look it’s cool to know the past and understand it, but when you use it to suck all the fun out of something so innocent and endearing,well, then you’re just being a dick.

So this Sunday, try and have as much fun as possible. Watch horror films, give out candy or go to a costume party. Just shine and let loose. It’s Halloween, and it is awesome.

Oh, and don’t smash pumpkins at insane speeds while driving because you might crash into a Winnebago and cry in front of the police. Just some advice.

-Happy Halloween from Aaron and the rest of the Obscure Gentlemen!